I am thankful that my husband listens to me and wants to help create a
space for me to be alone. Without hesitation he bought me an old chaise lounge
with happy, retro flowers on it and a side table for my book and cup of coffee last
week so I could specifically have a place in the gazebo for quiet. He knows me
so well and I appreciate that he cares for my soul in this way. We both know it benefits us all if Mom and Dad can spend time alone with Jesus.
But that time alone can be hard to find with 2 busy boys, homeschooling, working from home and keeping the house liveable. I’ve realized that my ideals for time alone don't match the
time I have. With good intention I usually pack up my "Quiet time" bag with a 3-ring notebook, journal, Bible/s,
planner, prayer list, and books to read- that would be: two for the teams I’m on, one for mentoring,
one I want read with a friend, and one my husband recommended. Oh and then the
ebooks- one a friend wrote and one I need to read about teaching. My bag has
gotten heavy. Then for some reason I feel angered when the kids need me before I
could possibly finish all that I intended to do! I should not exit this time discouraged and frustrated. This is not the picture of refreshing time I expect them to catch.
So at 9:15 today (meant to at 7:15 but had already read the
kids a Bible story, prayed about our worries and taught a song with a very wiggly boy by then so I
feel like that's a good morning too), I headed out with just an Andrew Murray
devotional page to read and a Proverb for the day to meditate on. At times I
need simple and concise. I read out loud to the birds in the rain, let go of
all the high expectations I have of myself and of my time and returned to the
house after 30 minutes to find the kids playing happily and their room not
destroyed (these are victories). They had time to get creative and both set up toys for a play tonight. I had returned inspired to write, calmly prepared to face their dismantled room, and appreciative of my life and nature. I'd never realized how much a squirrel's tail in the light looks like a feather!
I was going to include a cute up-close picture of my coffee
and Bible on my fabric chair, but I live in the same reality as most of you. I
didn’t edit the color because it is a little gloomy today. As you can see the
gazebo needs painting. The sparse grass needs cut. We have a dog pen there but
own no dog. The strawberry plant hanging above me is dead. The birds I hear
around me are mostly crows squawking. We live in town and at an intersection
that must have “Honk” painted beneath Stop. This is my “quiet time.” And yet I
want to make this space my own little sanctuary to listen. It can be beautiful.
No matter what your space, circumstance or time, may you to find a place away from your lists and planner and ridiculous stack of responsibilities to be filled with that river of living water.
"If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink." John 7:38
Thank you for sharing the ups and downs that are real life! I love to hear that you read even though it was rainy and somewhat gloomy, that you simply relaxed and saw te beauty of Gods creation in a small moment, and that the house was still in one piece in your absence! I love that we can be still and know that He is God. To inspire us God doesn't need anything but our attention. Love your new gazebo spot! Also-I think your house is peaceful and almost magical. There is so much character in everything from the sidewalk to the doors to the found objects inside. Thanks for sharing it with us!;)
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